October 14, 2024
  
Study Abroad

How to Solve Foreign Exchange Student Host Family Problems [Myths, Tips & Tricks]

foreign exchange student host family problems

Foreign exchange programs and multicultural experiences are an enriching part of students’ curriculum. As a host, you play a pivotal role in shaping the experience of your exchange student. Sometimes, miscommunications or issues arise, but there are ways to overcome foreign exchange student host family problems.

Ayusa is a non-profit organization that facilitates high school exchange programs in the USA with host schools and families. For over 40 years, we have connected international students with hosts to provide educational experiences and create stories for future global citizens. 

Common Foreign Exchange Student Host Family Problems

Hosting Foreign Exchange Students is a rewarding experience, but comes with unique challenges. Understanding and addressing common issues can help foster a positive experience for both the host family and the student. Some common problems include:

  • Cultural differences
  • Family dynamics
  • Behavioral issues
  • Homesickness

Cultural Differences

One of the most common challenges host families face is navigating cultural differences. Exchange students come from various backgrounds and bring unique customs, traditions, and values. What seems normal in your household could be new or uncomfortable for your student. These differences can range from meal times and dietary preferences to communication styles and expectations around personal space.

For example, in South Korea, communication is often indirect and influenced by a desire to maintain harmony. South Koreans may use more subtle or non-verbal cues to express disagreement or discomfort, rather than stating things directly. Communication can be quite different from the more straightforward style common in many American households, where openness and directness are often encouraged. 

Host families can help by explicitly inviting the student to share their thoughts and encouraging them to engage. Simple reassurances that it's okay to speak freely can go a long way in helping the student feel more comfortable.

Family Dynamics 

Integrating a new member into your family dynamic can be tricky, especially when that person comes from a different cultural background. Whether adjusting to new routines, parenting styles, or sibling relationships, both the student and the host family need time to adapt.

For example, in Brazil, time is more flexible, and people take a relaxed approach to scheduling and punctuality. This laid-back attitude towards time extends to daily routines, social events, and mealtimes, which might be more fluid than the structured schedules of American households.

Host families can help by setting clear expectations around time and routines early on while allowing for some flexibility. Explaining the importance of punctuality in certain contexts, like school or work, can help the student understand. 

Behavioral Issues 

Sometimes, host families may encounter behavioral issues with exchange students. Problems can include anything from minor rule-breaking to more significant challenges like school-related problems. Often, these issues stem from misunderstandings or stress related to being in a new environment.

For instance, a German student might openly express dislike for a particular activity without intending to be offensive, because they are used to being straightforward. Host families can explain the local norms around politeness and suggest ways to soften their feedback without suppressing their honesty.

Homesickness 

Homesickness is a natural part of the exchange experience. Your student is far from home, friends, and familiar surroundings, which can lead to feelings of loneliness or sadness. These feelings can affect their mood, behavior, and academic performance.

For instance, Mexican culture places a strong emphasis on family traditions, celebrations, and communal activities. Holidays, birthdays, and weekly family gatherings play a significant role in daily life. For a foreign student, being away from these familiar traditions, especially during key times like holidays, can intensify feelings of homesickness.

Host families can help by inviting the student to share celebrations, even in small ways. Participating in a cultural holiday can bridge the gap and give the student a sense of home. Allowing the student to cook a traditional dish, decorate for a holiday, or talk about their traditions can help ease feelings of homesickness. Encouraging the student to explore their surroundings and get involved in activities can also help them feel less isolated.

How to Navigate Foreign Exchange Student Host Family Problems

Successfully hosting a foreign exchange student involves being prepared to navigate the challenges that may arise. Here are some practical tips on how to handle common issues when you host an exchange student. These strategies include:

  • Treat the student as a family member
  • Be firm but kind
  • Address cultural differences
  • Maintain open communication

Treat the Student as a Family Member

Treat the exchange student as a true member of the family, rather than just a guest. Involve them in family activities, chores, and decisions where appropriate. Clear, consistent rules and expectations can help the student feel secure and know where they stand. Be patient and understanding as everyone adjusts to the new family dynamic.

Example: Emma from Germany joined the Roberts family, who had two teenage children close to her age. At first, Emma felt awkward and out of place, especially during the family's weekend outings and dinners, where everyone shared inside jokes. Emma often hesitated to join conversations, feeling like an outsider. 

The Roberts family noticed and reached out to their community representative for advice. They made an effort to involve Emma in family traditions. One weekend, they invited her to plan their weekly Sunday barbecue. The recipes from her hometown were a hit, making her feel like a true member of the family.

Be Firm but Kind

Address behavioral issues early and directly, but always with empathy. Understand that the student may be dealing with culture shock or homesickness. Set boundaries and expectations clearly from the start, and reinforce them consistently but kindly. Open communication and a supportive approach help the student feel comfortable expressing their feelings, which helps resolve issues more easily.

Example: Let’s say your exchange student, Sara, frequently stays out past the agreed curfew. Instead of letting frustration build up or responding with anger, have a calm conversation with her. Explain why the curfew exists, share your concerns, and ask for her perspective. 

Perhaps Sara’s family has a different approach to curfews. Your community representative can provide guidance in navigating the nuances of such situations. By being firm but kind, you establish that the rules are non-negotiable, but you’re also willing to listen.

Address Cultural Differences

Approach these differences with curiosity rather than judgment. You may need to adjust your communication style to set clear expectations and create mutual understanding. Encouraging the student to share their culture through cooking a meal, celebrating a holiday, or telling stories can help bridge gaps and foster a deeper connection.

Example: Say your student, Yumi from Japan, is uncomfortable with the casual way your family discusses topics during meals. She’s used to a more reserved and formal dining setting. She starts eating in her room instead. 

To address this issue, you contact your community representative and discuss the best way to approach your student. You have an open discussion about meal traditions in both cultures. Perhaps you agree on a middle ground, like keeping some meals quieter or incorporating some of Yumi's dining customs to make her feel more at home.

Maintain Open Communication

Open communication strengthens your family bonds. Encourage your student to keep in touch with their family and friends back home, but also engage in activities. Introduce them to local clubs, sports teams, or community events that align with their interests. 

For Joanna from Taiwan and Chiaki and Ayaka from Japan, the school soccer team was the highlight of their experiences in the USA. Show empathy and offer comfort to help them adjust. Remind them that it’s okay to feel homesick and that it’s a normal part of the process.

Example: Diego was struggling with homesickness and seemed distant during family gatherings. His host family initiated a weekly check-in session where everyone shared the highs and lows of their week, making Diego feel included and supported. 

After a conversation with their community representative, the family knew exactly what to do next. They encouraged him to join a local volleyball team, connecting him with something familiar and enjoyable. These efforts helped Diego feel more grounded and gradually eased his homesickness.

Myths about Foreign Exchange Student Host Family Problems 

Many families are excited about the idea of hosting a study abroad student but may hesitate due to various myths and misconceptions about hosting foreign exchange students. The three most common myths are:

  1. Hosting an exchange student strains your family
  2. Language barriers will be overwhelming
  3. Hosting is too expensive

By addressing these myths, you can feel more confident about opening your home to students from other cultures.

Myth #1: Hosting an Exchange Student Strains Your Family

Many prospective host families worry that having an exchange student will disrupt their family dynamic or create strain. In truth, hosting can strengthen family bonds and provide valuable growth opportunities. Families often find that the experience brings them closer as they navigate new experiences together and embrace a shared responsibility.

Hosting fosters stronger relationships with the local community as you involve neighbors, schools, and friends in welcoming the student. Children in the household often benefit by learning adaptability, empathy, and cultural sensitivity. For many, the experience becomes a cherished memory that enriches family life for years to come.

Myth #2: Language Barriers Will Be Overwhelming

Concerns about communication difficulties are common, but language barriers are rarely as daunting as they seem. Most exchange students have a good grasp of English, and any initial struggles with slang, accents, or cultural nuances are typically short-lived.

Communication improves naturally as the student becomes more immersed in the family and community. Plus, many host families find creative ways to bridge the gap with hand gestures, translation apps, or turning language learning into a family activity.

Myth #3: Hosting Is Too Expensive

While some families fear that hosting an exchange student will be a financial burden, this is largely a myth. Organizations like Ayusa provide comprehensive support and the student’s parents cover the fees, medical insurance, and basic needs. 

The host family’s primary responsibility is to provide room and board, including three daily meals. As a host, the financial responsibility is minimal. In addition, you can claim a $50 tax write-off for each month of hosting.

Using Program Support with Ayusa

We assign each exchange student a Community Representative (CR) who works with the host and student from start to finish. Monthly check-ins ensure your student makes progress toward their goals and the experience runs smoothly. The CR also stays in contact with the student’s high school to take care of reports and sign forms. 

We support you every step of the way and there is always someone available for emergencies 24/7. Ayusa provides a robust network of resources designed to help host families and exchange students navigate the challenges of cultural exchange. Here’s how you can make the most of the support available.

Community Representatives (CR)

Your Ayusa Community Representative is your first line of support. They are experienced in managing the unique challenges that can arise in high school study abroad programs and are available to provide guidance, answer questions, and offer advice. 

Regular check-ins with your CR can help catch potential issues early and ensure that both the host family and the student feel supported. Don't hesitate to reach out to your CR even for minor concerns or questions. They are there to help with everything from setting expectations to offering cultural insights that can ease transitions.

24/7 Emergency Support

In the unlikely event of an emergency, Ayusa offers 24/7 emergency support to ensure that both your family and the exchange student have access to immediate assistance. This service provides peace of mind, knowing that help is always available, no matter the time or circumstance.

Why Host with Ayusa 

Hosting with Ayusa promotes cross-cultural understanding, and enriches your family life, allowing you to experience a new culture firsthand. Many host families report gaining lifelong friends and unforgettable memories through unique opportunities like the Yes exchange student program. Here are some of the best reasons to host with Ayusa:

  1. Ayusa has 40+ years of experience coordinating foreign exchange programs. 
  2. As one of the best student exchange programs for a host family, we thoroughly screen students and match them with host families based on shared interests and values. 
  3. Ayusa takes care of major logistical concerns like handling students' school fees and medical insurance, relieving host families of administrative burdens.
  4. Ayusa emphasizes cultural exchange, fostering lifelong global connections and personal growth for both the family and students.

Ready to start your hosting journey? Learn who can host and meet our students.

Preparing for a Successful Hosting Experience

Setting clear expectations is key to a successful hosting experience with study abroad organizations like Ayusa. Before your exchange student arrives, writing down the household rules, daily routines, and family traditions can help your exchange student feel at home. Ayusa provides resources to establish these expectations, ensuring a smoother transition. Preparing your home by organizing the student’s space and making them feel welcome will set the stage for a positive experience from day one.

Pre-Arrival Communication

Building a connection with your Ayusa exchange student before their arrival can make a significant difference. Introduce your family, share photos of your home, and learn more about the student’s interests. Early communication can address any questions or concerns they may have and set a welcoming tone.

For example, ask the student about cultural practices that are important to them, and discuss how your family can incorporate them. Make sure they understand what activities are available in your area, and tell them about potential travel plans or excursions your family is planning during their stay. Go over the logistics of their arrival, including who will pick them up, what the first few days will look like, and any orientation activities.

Create a Family Handbook

A thoughtful approach to preparation can ease the transition for everyone involved. A guide that includes emergency contact numbers, Wi-Fi passwords, nearby shops, transportation options, and a list of local attractions can serve as a go-to resource for your student as they acclimate to their new surroundings.

Include a checklist of important tasks to complete in the first week, such as acquiring a local SIM card, setting up a school schedule, or familiarizing them with public transportation options. Within the first week of arrival, help your student set up any necessary appointments, such as school enrollment meetings, orientation sessions, or health check-ups. Making these arrangements early can help the student feel more grounded.

Arrival Day Suggestions

Outline the logistics of your student’s arrival to minimize uncertainty. Discuss who will pick them up at the airport, what they can expect in the first few days and any initial activities. Having a rough schedule for the first week can help the student feel prepared and less anxious about what’s to come.

Consider having a low-key family dinner and a quick tour of the home. Allow time for rest and recovery from travel, and avoid overwhelming them with too much information right away. The first few days should be about settling in and getting comfortable.

Hear From Past Ayusa Host Families

At Ayusa, we've seen firsthand how hosting exchange students transforms families. Our host families consistently say that their hearts and homes grow as they form lifelong friendships that cross borders.

  • The Loughs: Hosting over 100 students, they embraced learning about different cultures and were invited to travel the world by their exchange students.
  • The Brays: Loved how hosting allowed them to share their rich cultural background while learning new global customs and manners.
  • The Mitchells: Their student became an integral part of their family, creating lifelong bonds and memories.
  • The Suggs: Watched their daughter and their exchange student grow as close as sisters, experiencing mutual cultural learning.

We love hearing these stories because they reflect the deeper purpose of our program: building lifelong connections and learning from each other’s cultures. Many of our host families return year after year to welcome new exchange students into their homes, and it's because of the enriching, positive impact these students leave on their lives.

Get in touch to learn more about what to expect when hosting foreign exchange students. Or, request more information if you still have unanswered questions.

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